Happy Father's Day , Dad!

i've been thinking about doing this blog for a few days, when i finally get in bed but my mind won't turn off. having a baby is such hard work! i love my kid but i'm not in love with being a mom yet. when i want to sleep, he doens't and vice versa. when i finally sit down to eat after he's been calm all day he starts to cry or when i finally sit down to use the computer.

i havn't wanted to blog about my dad. i'm sure most of you have heard about him now. he passed away june 3rd while i was in guatemala. unfortunately, we were'nt able to get Santiago's VISA before he passed. my dad had been sick for many years but still his passing came as a surprise becuase he was due to get discharged from the hospital the same day. i felt that if i wrote about it, it would make it much more real and i wasn't ready for that. i think i'm still in denial. i'm still expecting my dad to walk through the door smiling, singing, and shouting "Sing it Sister!" to a Diana Ross CD.

But for Father's Day, as a tribute to my dad, i wanted to give some snapshots, not so much in actual picture form but in memories. Here are just a few of the special memories I have of my loving father...in no particular order...

1. Riding in his orange Fiat standing up on the passenger seat with my head sticking you of the sunroof, hair flying behind me, smiling and laughing. such joy.(if he did that these days he'd be in jail with britney spears)

2. Like I mentioned above, my dad would blare his blues, jazz, or opera and on the especially high or climactic notes, he'd shout, "Sing it Sister!" or "Amen Brother! Hallelujia!"

3. When he took me practice driving in his root beer brown pickup and i only made it one block before i got scared, started crying, and he had to drive me home. Before he took over tho, at my request, he was so patient and really encouraging.

4. His great cooking skills. Before he stopped drinking coffee, he'd make coffee you had to chew and special potatoes for breakfast and great ham and beans with corn bread!

5. My dad's love for all cultures and foods. I'm sure before I ever left the country for the first time I had been exposed to a variety of cultures within the comfort of my own home through my dad's different music, love for food, and interest in all kinds of shows and movies about different countries.

6. Dancing through the house to "I Will Survive!"

7. Laughing our heads off to the movie "Auntie Mame", or Blue Collar Comedy Tour, or the Carol Burnett Show, among others.

8. Eating at a little beach front cafe on the border of Long beach and Seal Beach. I don't remember the name but i only ever went there only with my dad.

9. Talking on the phone with him more often after Santiago was born and dad's love for him before meeting him.

10. Saying goodnight to him with a hug and kiss every night before going to bed whenever I was home.

I love my dad and am so sad he never got to meet Santiago but know they will meet in heaven someday. There are so many things that will always remind me of my dad. Especially concerning movies, music, food and cultures. It's not surprising that two out of four of his daughters married latinos. he was a proud member and donar of the Museum of Latin American Art in Long beach. Tho my dad never traveled outside the country, you'd have thought he had if you ever talked to him about other countries. he was a very intellectual man.

i am so happy he got to meet beto. he connected with beto right away. it was love at first sight. one other great memory is when beto told me that my dad had told him "you are myson."

i love my dad and am grateful to God that we can celebrate Beto's first father's day this year.